Humm

Beating drums,

Splashing water,

Fluid thats red.

Blank white paper,

Untuned guitar,

Purr of a cat,

Unsuspecting sigh,

Door slammed close 

Loud. Very loud.

Elevator

Dark night

Unconnected headphones

Closet locked

A stare, a start,

A falling teardrop

Silent. Very silent

Hurricane

Racing car

Trip down the memory lane

Voices

Voices of past

Voices unknown

"Don't waste your time on me

Your already the voice inside my head"

...

I have been meaning to update these pages but I have been a little lost these days. Its hard to find your center what your anchor itself is floating. Its quite overwhelming, the events that have been unfolding. I wonder where it will all lead to.

I feel like a mere spectator of my own life.

Walk Along

Fire & flames,

Chimes & choir,

All things good,

All things bad,

Walk along

Times that were,

Walk along,

Times that are,

Walk along

A distant echo,

A shy smile,

A stiffened giggle,

An angry rant,

Walk along

Times that were,

Walk along,

Times that are,

Walk along

A soothing voice, ruffled hair,

Moments of fiery passion,

The sheets tell a story,

A story untold,

Walk along

The demon of a mind that is

A bully, a mirror,

A book in the writing.

The pages that never fly away,

Till its time has come,

To be swept away in waves,

Buried down under,

Or burned in the holy fire

Times that were,

Times that are,

Always walk along

Illusion Airlines

Welcome to flight number 603,
your trip will begin from reality to la la land.

This flight will be piloted by Imagination and co-piloted by Confusion.

You will be shortly served by
imaginary creatures, rapists, thugs,
naked ladies, aliens or anything else you desire.

You can also conveniently choose your location
from among cliffs, aquamarine, space, barren lands,
shady corners, playboy mansion
or many such attractive locations
mentioned in our catalog.

The calculated time of your journey
will be shortly told to you once you have been served.

Some passengers may experience turbulence during the journey,
we suggest you to take necessary precautions beforehand.

We wish you have a pleasant and euphoric flight,
and you reach your destination fully satisfied.
Thank you for choosing us,
we are glad to partner with you tonight.

While I stare at my blank computer screen...

I feel like I am living in a musical. It sure is dramatic. Full with emotions- Love, hate, crime, tragedy, humor and well, all that.

The daily frustrations rise to a crescendo.

And then its time to go back home. aka the fall.

The morning sun brings smiles (when its sunny) and glum (when it pours)

Its like an external force pulls the strings.

Or is it supposed to be that way?

Life, it seems, really is a stage.

hmmm...

I wonder if I am a good actor

If I fair well

I think I do

That why I am still in the plot

Oh wait a minute!

I did loose the plot...FUCK!

I dont like the sound of this keyboard.

Pencil scratching paper is soo much better.

Its a bitter sweet symphony.

HA! Its life!

I do wonder sometimes,

If its worth it.

But then the external force never fails to surprise me.

What a joke. Thank god I do have a sense of humor.

Talk about being humble.

*sigh*

No matter how carefully I keep my headphones,

They always, ALWAYS entangle.

Its a struggle

I must have spoiled atleast 40 pairs.

Rest in peace dear ones, I still love you.

I think that can never run out of blabber.

But then I do fall short of words sometimes.

And these days,

Most of the times.

Dear god, when will I be satisfied?

Sin or divine?

Twiddles and twirls,
a glass of wine,
dark, mysterious,
sin or divine?

A blossom of tingle,
lingering, twinkling,
the night is still young,
a slight inkling!

A companion of the night,
a warm comfort of crime,
yet none of it matters,
Oh! The sound of sweet chimes!

The stars my shine in their glory,
the wind may seductively sway,
a sip of sin in your hand,
The entire world at bay.

Oh! My vivid lover!
Dance with me tonight
In my arms, by my side,
My imagination’s flight!

Instabilities and uncertainties

Living every day as a fruitless struggle is a sure shot formula to loose the minuscule sanity residing in one's top floor. Its tested. By me. (now you know, it truly is true)

'I don't remember where I heard this, but the line stuck to me - This too shall pass.' Rob at his best to lighten my mood. But well, my mood is a tough competition to the Mumbai monsoons.

The day I was packing my bags, bags full of dreams and ambitions, to leave the city a voice inside me said - this cant be it.

'Chubby, its not over till the fat lady sings. Trust me, something will turn up' said Sheen

And well, the bags were unpacked, smiles were blossomed, cheer was spread.

It, in the end, was worth it

:-)

How to stop your yelling mind from talking to you.

I checked my phone for the 56th time. No reply back. I don't even expect it you know, I know it will not come. But still.

Snap out. NOW. isn't it enough for you to feel all bad and sad and mad and all the kind of shit?! does he even care?! does he?!

Well, I am sure he does...

OK, if he does, what the f is he doing about it? what? WHAT!

...

sorry, did you say something? 'cuz all i heard is the god damn noisy FAN!

Amm, listen, i don't need all this right now. Please. Just like go away or something.

And leave you sorry soul to feel all the more sorry for yourself? ha? guess what? Not happening! NA AH!

*sigh* ... Amm, How 'bout some South Park?

Sounds good to me! VOOHOO!

*THE END*

...

If the reason

That reasons justification

is a reason not strong enough,

Will the reason still hold true?

Or can you turn it around?

A bit of me

There are pieces of me
Lying here and there
On the bed, under it,
Around the corner
On the cupboard.
There is a bit of me, everywhere
Waiting, waiting for me

A part of me for you my friend,
Here,
You take some too,
You get a bigger piece ( you know, I love you)
You get a chunk too

Bit by bit I give myself away
Affection, feelings, warmth, love,
A lil token, saying I adore you,
A lil bit of affection,
In pieces
I let myself live
In the live of those,
Loved by me.

These pieces then call out to me
Neglected in a corner they lay
A little shattered
A little heartbroken
A little mad at me
For letting them go

I will reach out to you,
My dear ones,
I will collect you soon
Soon when the love runs out
You shall return to me.

Cultivation of a bored mind

There is a voice somewhere in the background. It pleads for my attention. Not because it wants to be heard, but because it speaks of my own good.

It talks to a voice inside me. It says “you paid for this, the least you can do is gain something out of it”. The voice inside me doesn’t reply. It also had a straight face. Well, the voice is mine after all.

All this while, I stare at the professor in front of me. His smiling face struggled hard to keep the students from wondering off.

A scan around the class and you find some interesting happings. A love story blossoming at the corner back seats, a couple of stoned guys staring at nothingness, a poet weaving his imagination, a couple of girls discussing class gossip and a few like me, too bored to care.

Though, there were a couple of students, front row loyalists, who managed to catch every word that escaped the professor’s mouth. The professor knew they were his only hope.

The professor (who seemed like a nice man just that his voice bounced off my ears) smiled brightest whenever a question was raised. The students would do so, well, if announced a break.

Over coffee, tea and kurkure, one overhears some random amusing conversations. What all one does to keep oneself awake. Some others say this class is such a waste.

I wonder why some think that these classes are worth nothing. After all, what else class teaches you to daydream, fantasize and imitate?

Dear diary

Dear Diary!
I am soo sorry I didnt bring you along this trip back home! I miss you! very dear so! :( sad.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! :)

Well, you know how it went for me. Was quite good eh? Though I lost someone dear to me, they were great things that happened to me the past year. I love my friends, and yes I have finally come to terms with the fact that you can’t have everything you want, the way you want it :P ...quite late I know, but well "happy realization" (I love saying that btw)

Awesome memories in my head rite now! anu, shona di, ritu, lakshay, akhil...awesome people! Yes, no doubt they are TWISTED...But they sure are awesome! And then, my lou! Rob! I love you baby! :) You are just...ah! (ok, no subliminal thinking now!)

Shifting to Mumbai was something I always wanted...SOO BAD! And finlayy! voohoo! Couldn’t be happier! I love my life there. Yea its tough, but then this is what I always wanted, isnt it? Well, you got it! I fair out pretty well, according to my standards that it. I love every bit of it. Money crunch, vada pav, chai wala, jerry, underwear boys! (LOL!) some life! :D

Not to forget all the awesome people iv met! A bunch of 54 (now reduced to 52) talented and twisted people...and well a few more! :) Living in Mazda Mansion turned out to be blissful! I had no hope id find people as retarded as me, but alor! Mistaken mistaken! I am soooooo grateful I found people I get along with beautifully! AND people who like me despite of, oh well, my retard-ness! voohoo JACKPOT!

there are a few thing i really miss though,
-Family
-Anu and Shona di
-street food
-Delhi winters (that's all i can think of right now)

And well! My goofball is here too! M soo happy! :) i love how things are shaping up! 10 months, sounds pretty ok...but then, whoa! 10 months! And half of it was long distance! *pat on the back* I won’t start now about how awesome it has been... coz well...ITS JUST BEEN! (I really wish I could describe my expression, I guess I am not that skilled)

I soo wanted us to be together at 12 but then..I wanted to be home too.. :) love being at home! I don’t do anything! ANYTHING AT ALL!

AND! I’ve finally come to a conclusion that Delhi winters are NOT enjoyed the best snuggling under a heavy quilt BUT by stepping out and feeling the chill! We went out yesterday to shop and good god it was cold! The most amazing part was the street food! spicy chicken kebabs, pipping hot! Right off the street! Toss in a dark foggy sky and 8 degrees of temperature and you have a perfect Delhi winter evening! :D

Plus I had pizza today! What a way to welcome a new year! Family, pizza and mindless movie on TV! I say... Perfect!

P.S- I really miss my Delhi people when i'm in Mumbai! :(

P.S.S- I really miss my Mumbai people rite now!